introduction to the hellhole:

i'm james. i go by "despairingdreamer" on most of the platforms i'm on. sometimes "cheerfulbitter" or "despairdreamer" if the site has a stricter username character limit.

i'm a loser with a lot of time on my hands, mostly because i'm in online school. i work a part-time job at a boba shop with unfortunate financials and i live with my girlfriend and her mom. lol, that's probably kinda tmi for a guy whose website you just stumbled upon. but this is a personal blog, so it may only get worse than that.

i'm going to host a personal blog on this website, hopefully update every week or two. we'll see how that works out. i'm also gonna host shrines, autistic rants, art, and "webcomics," if i ever make them. stick around if you wanna. =)

get the hell away if you:

• support the police. all cops are bastards, i don't care what you say. barbecue their dicks!!!
• like/engage with melanie martinez, south park, vivziepop, or mindless self indulgence. not just cause they're bad people, but also cause i'm a hater and i hate MM and south park specifically.
• stand with israel. fuck you.
• are transphobic, misogynistic, racist, queerphobic, or ableist. fucking loser. i also don't like conformist, capitalist/consumerist fuckheads. idk that many words for my feelings but you should be able to tell pretty easily if you aren't welcome!

(NEW!) sign my guestbook, if you want: